revelations on a friday public hol...

planned in earnest and happy anticipation for a pitch tent camp over

at Pasir Ris Park. Ended up having to abort that plan.

Tent permit quota maxed out...and then the oil spill.

Oh well...turned out to be a blessing in disguise.

Got to go back home and clear some outstanding church work

and misc stuffs...packed a bit of room...

and most importantly, rest and get a proper sleep on my bed.

Alternative Plan.

Thought of exploring this island which i read somewhere in newspaper

that it's accessible and is rustic.

Happily made our way there in the van and the realising that the road doesn't seemed to be opened.

Strange. But then...I think it's accessible. Just that we din really give it a try.

Decided to stay put at the Seletar dam and there's a little park at the reservoir side too.

So just find our way to the little shed.

While doing all this, we're still threatened by the impending rain from opposite the reservoir and from the Johore Straits...stressed stressed...

Laid out our mats and brought out the food.

Then came thunder and lightning and storm clouds approaching nearer.

Decided to move back into the van again...just in case.

Finally, the move was justified.

It rained after quite a while and we also go to read and nap in the van in peace with light cooling breeze.

sure a bliss.

My revelation is simple.

Sometimes we planned so much and in the end things just don't happen the way we want it.

Take it in your stride and who knows, it could be a blessing in disguise.

Then as you try to explore possibilities in life, maybe in relationship/career/things you do,

you walked the journey and realize it's not a wise decision, or simply just wrong

and you retrace your steps or just choose another alternative.

There's disappointment and fear along the way...but sometimes you just have to do it.

Ultimately, He'll bring you to where you are meant to be...and the previous experiences are probably "preparations" or "enrichment".

So yeah...don't think/worry too much. Just do it first. Follow your heart.

Often we say make "wise decision", but I guess wise people often don't take too long to respond.

If take too long to decide, the decision might not be that wise after all.

Haha...wow...i'm so philosophical! ;)

2wks has passed...

and it has been a little overwhelming

exciting and at times stressful

mind-wrecking...

I went in at their peak

work intensity was high

everybody was sucked into their work

the office is cold

and i'm feeling the coldness from people...

though there're glimpse of family-ness.

working past 7pm and reaching home late..

leaving only 2 hours before I sleep at 11pm..

Not sure if this is the kind of life He has called me to...

Perhaps it's just my 2nd week.

Hence having these second thoughts.

Give myself more time...

and I'll probably ease into it.

At least 1 to 2 years...

before evaluating what's the next step.

some of my colleagues actually asked me

why I chose this firm?

And when i said I applied to URA and HDB too,

they exclaimed, "why not go there?!"

Haha...perhaps they felt jaded already.

Stat board has their benefits and perks.

Attractive indeed.

Work may not be as challenging and exciting.

Nevermind, give this a shot first!

I'm curious to find out from my colleagues

who has family and kids.

How did they manage?

Now, i'm just looking forward to long weekends,

weekends with NOTHING on my schedule...

of course don't mind hanging out with syota.

Look forward to taking leave...

even if it's just one day or two.

Look forward to short holidays...

and hopefully can go Korea with family

at end of the year.

Last week of freedom

Monday

Took Express502 to try out the route in the morning rush hour.

Decided to take train in the end.

Hung out at SMU and use my laptop there with wireless@SG.

SMU so deserted in the morning...but nice to have such a place in the city,

lots of benches, food kiosks and power points and free wireless! ;)

Met financial adviser during lunch and started planning for my long term finances...

Tuesday

Cut hair at Bugis then drop by 313@Somerset.

First time visiting it, quite nice actually.

Chill out at Toastbox at the Food Republic top floor.

Spacious, quiet and it's beside the sky garden.

Got to have a view outside.

Went with Joachim for a promotional massage.

I almost died.

The masseur really tried very hard to "fix" my back.

Wednesday

new Mac Ritchie visitor area

Wanted to go Ubin.

But my back was really painful.

And I wanna enjoy a lazy morning too.

So yeah, somehow ended up at Mac Ritchie.

Luckily there's a cafe there.

Spend my afternoon there too to do some writing

and surf internet.

Drop by SMOTA for evening mass

before heading home for dinner

Thursday

Last tuition at tuition centre

Felt a tinge of sadness when I broke the news

to my primary 5 class.

This batch is more sensible and easier to manage.

Though I miss my prev batch with all the nonsense too.

Friday

Spotted people finishing in the canal as I was cycling to

SAFRA Jurong.

Morning went swimming @ SAFRA Jurong.

Read magazine along with a cup of ice lemon tea...

thinking that I'll hardly get to do this again.

Met up with financial adviser again.

Presented me quite a lot of informative stuff.

Then met up with Gregory and had a good talk with him.

Saturday

Hearty breakfast at Conny's place with

freshly baked German bread.

Rushed down to meet up with MM peeps.

Congrats to Annette who's engaged!

Then rushed for high tea with family at

Merchant Court. It was a hurried affair trying to

gobble down as much food within a short time.

Very tired at the end of all this ordeal.

Think in future, I just want to chill out at home

the whole Saturday, with maybe my loved one by my side..

reading a book, watching a movie...exercising. ;)

3rd May here I come! Set my mind to really give it a good shot,

carve out my career and work hard!

While playing and praying hard too!

am I too critical?...

dunno why these few days or these days...i seemed to be correcting pple...being honest to tell them their mistakes...and then trying my best to also not make them feel lousy by affirming them in other ways. What a tussle.

phone repaired and I passed my IPPT

Again, an adventurous few days leading up to IPPT.

Handphone spoilt and sent for servicing.

Was uncontactable for almost 2 days.

Then I fell sick one week before my IPPT.

Have been postponing my IPPT for don't know how many times.

Was making great effort to train for my 2.4km run.

And I've never made it below 13mins.

My ego and pride never seemed to accept the possibility of me

failing my IPPT. But I still remained realistic, that it could happen.

Yesterday, I stepped into Maju Camp with a heavy heart.

Taking a test is never a simple matter.

Especially after 5 years of IPPT-exemption.

The rest of the 4 stations were never a problem for me.

I cleared them pretty much with ease.

And then came the 2.4km.

Already feeling a bit of fatigue from clearing the 4 stations,

I prayed really hard.

Just before I took off at the starting point,

I desperately shouted in me, "Jesus, run with me!"

And off I go.

For the first 2 rounds of 400m each, I ran at 1:45.

Which is well below my training time.

But I was getting out of breath and legs getting tired.

But I just pressed on. Running with a group really helped

to push me beyond the limit.

And yes, I came in at 12:23. I passed!

with incentive of $100. haha.

But really, I thought getting a Silver is not a problem for me.

But I guess i need to train a little bit more to go under 12:00.

During this test, I depended on Him a lot.

I prayed a lot. And was preparing for the worst.

But was telling myself not to conceit defeat before the race.

I thank God for this blessing and Mother Mary for the intercessions.

And my little gorgeous who prayed for me.

One heavy load off my shoulder. Off to clear the rest! =D

Long overdue reflection of the GK Trip

(i wrote it in my journal, just no time to transfer it onto the screen) =P

My life-changing encounter in Philippines took place during the Asian Youth Day in Nov'09.
A major event that saw me overwhelm by the Filipinos' hospitality, warmth & unreserved expression of love.
The religious (seminarians, priests and sisters) are particularly inspiring then.

The second time to Philippines for the Taize Pilgrimmage of Trust was more of a intimate and deep encounter with Br Gerry and the youths of the parish from Our Lady of Mt Carmel Church.

So for this third time in Philippines, my biggest purpose was to bring as much people from S'pore/SFA to experience that love and that transformation that I've experienced. I want to SHARE this with as many people as possible. Good things must share right? ;)

Planning for this wasn't smooth sailing and I almost cancelled it.Thankfully, it went through.
When God wants you to do this, and deep inside your heart you know you want to do this, He'll make sure it happens. At the time when we have to make up the minimum no. of 10 people, I simply just trust & believe. Deep down, I know He'll help make that number. Haha, come to think of it, how nice if we could make it a "12". The 12 apostles and disciples of Jesus. lol

Although I told myself and others to go there without expectations,
I kind of know what I'm about to experience.
Not overtly surprised by their hospitality & warmth.
But the living conditions were better than I thought.
I'm not always a fan of kids esp. if there's constant pestering.
But in this trip, I just told myself to let go and be a kid once again.

Nevertheless, it was another fulfilling trip. Gained more than I've given.
This trip was very much needed.
I think it keeps one sane in this modern society of ours.
To take a chance to give back what we've been blessed with
To touch & feel the world and people.
To know what's "free" love & unreserved love is.
I enjoyed carrying the kids, "throwing" them around.
Made me feel like a father.
This physical touch & closeness of kinship and family bond,
are very much lacking in our lives now.
And I'm really thankful for my foster family, for the times spent together.
It was especially touching for me when I got to help Krizia (only daughter)
to wrap her textbooks with the plastic film at night before sleep.
So her mum, myself and Krizia were doing it together.
I think Joachim somehow was there too to help us tear the scotch tape
while watching TV. =P

The children's joy & innocent laughter are antidotes to our weary and empty soul.
I enjoyed the special times I have with some of the kids during breaks.
They enjoyed my company too by just being there, huddling close to me
and amusing me with their silly tricks.
I'll never forget this small boy, Patrick.
On the last night when I was hanging around outside the loud booming KTV room,
he caught my attention and started to introduce himself
and wrote his name on sand.
Then we began having Math lesson. I gave him some simple Maths and he wrote the answers down on the sand. He enjoyed it tremendously. The glow in his eyes and the disappointment on his face when he didn't get it right. Cute!

And of course, I'm more than glad to be able to find someone like Paul who shares the similar passion in music and composition as much as me. He's really gifted.
What blew me away was how he just simply poured out his heart and shared about the stories behind each song that he wrote. Simply heartfelt, moving and real.
Something that we Singaporeans ought to learn,
to not always wear a mask, put up a defence system,
and ever so weary to pour out our hearts and share our real self with others.

It's up one level for me.
Learning about people and myself.
Not so pleasant things happened just before the trip to me
And the trip ended with us almost not being able to fly just because I didn't bring along my
credit card for verfication.
Oh well, I just learnt to count my blessings and not let the positive experience be marred by those few not so nice experiences.

words of wisdom

took it inside the toilet at Philippines Airport Terminal 2.